Comments on: Compatibility criteria alone will not help you find true love

By: Jane

Jane — Sun, 18 Jun 2006 00:04:01 +0000

did someone say dmarmony? ‘that’ site well, I’m a sucker too cause I went on took a VERY long quizy thingy like .. and then after like a month, ‘the one’ for me came up and looking at his profile I was thinking where did my trial period $7.95 go to because not only did he have kids and lived in BoraBora he didn’t even have a membership to communicate with me! clearly it’s wrong for the man of my dreams can actually afford to mail me not just smile or wink

By: Zoe

Zoe — Sun, 20 Nov 2005 13:07:04 +0000

Rinatta,

I used the dating site you refer to. Initially I began to wonder if I was on the wrong planet since they couldn’t find ANY matches for me. Then they found one - 150 miles away - and I have no idea what they thought we had in common, even based solely on a couple of emails ( I saw no compatibility there whatsoever). Next they found me a match locally, I met him and we went out a couple of times, and I did not understand why they thought we would be compatible. I have been happily dating someone I met by a bit of a fluke from a free dating site. I have no idea whether our compatibility ratings would match or not based on the EXPENSIVE site’s criteria, but we are very happy, best friends, and doing quite well.

Thanks for your newlsetters, and for debunking this site. One thing I did get out of it, was the founder’s book, and determining my top ten must have and can’t stand list. This has been valuable to me, but only after years of self work, as you have been advocating, and I have been reading, for years!

By: geri

geri — Thu, 03 Nov 2005 09:28:32 +0000

I agree that compatibility tests do not really show if two people are compatible together. I think I’ll stick more to the traditional dating (even online dating would be good) than just taking compatibility tests to see if your love match is really your true love. The chemistry, friendship and love that they share between them will tell if they are each other’s perfect match, if they will experience the great love affair they’ve always dreamed of with each other.

By: frankie

frankie — Mon, 24 Oct 2005 04:56:23 +0000

I am really into this view with regards to compatibility. I feel that something more than agreement constitute love. In reality, compability has become a greater issue than the most pressing concerns. True does not necessarily mean that couples have so much in common.

By: Brian

Brian — Tue, 18 Oct 2005 15:28:11 +0000

This article was sent to me by a friend. It really opened my eyes. I dated a woman for a year who had two very young children.(2 1/2 and 4)I have no children. She is 30. I am 35 It was a big transition for me, but I did feel positive about it. Four months in she told me the relationship was not getting to the next level. We picked it back up. Same thing happened in five more months. She went to the dating website as described one month later and in three weeks met a divorced 41 year old and accepted a marriage proposal. She told me that she had been in three relationships that had failed and she had nothing to lose by moving so quickly. It made me think there was some magic formula on the website, but I realize there is not and it may just be two people with mutual needs or dysfunctions.

By: Mylene

Mylene — Tue, 18 Oct 2005 12:42:42 +0000

Compatibility is important in a relationship. But I must agree with you that it is not the only thing to be considered. There are other elements too like trust and commitment for your partner.

By: Roxana

Roxana — Mon, 05 Sep 2005 05:21:05 +0000

I agree with you! I did suscribe to the site you are referring to and had a relationship with a guy who seemed to be so much like me.. it was like a mirror..
it wasnt until the relationship ended that I realized that the mirror was to see myself and work out my dysfunctional areas! thanks God that when I found also so many similarities in this “perfect” relationship with the other bad ones I have had, I went out to seek help to stop this..
now Im alone, but commited to my personal growth work , so in a near future I will be able to engage in healthy relationships..

By: Jacque

Jacque — Mon, 05 Sep 2005 04:07:57 +0000

wow … compatible with each others’ dysfunction. I’ve never thought of it that way but it is SO true! Thanks for this insight.

By: Cheryl

Cheryl — Sun, 04 Sep 2005 16:00:14 +0000

I totally agree with your comments regarding compatability. I’ve taken the online quiz you are referring to……and felt it was rather a joke when it came to making matches. And the information they provide potential matches is not enough to really assess whether it is somebody you want to “check out” or not. Personally, I know I have not done enough work on myself to be honest about what or whom I should be looking for. Maybe that means I”m not ready to be in a relationship yet…who knows.